3/17/2019

Did you miss our letter yesterday? I chose to go to a wedding. I think it was a good choice. The church was my kind of place - full of triangles and trapezoids. The unconventional service included a sand ceremony where the bride and groom took turns pouring sand into a jar to symbolize how they were joining together forever…

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3/15/2019

…It looks like you enjoyed yourself at the Shamrock Bowl presentation event with the taoiseach yesterday. Now that you and Leo are "fast friends," perhaps you could ask why the folks in Ireland would prefer an open border with Northern Ireland and why that issue is a sticking point in the Brexit deal…

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3/14/2019

… I understand that Friend of Ireland and MA Rep. Richard Neal (D) may join you at some point. According to the Boston Globe (BG), he's quite the gentleman. He keeps a low profile and doesn't say much, living by the credo, "just remember, you never have to explain anything you didn’t say." You might consider adopting that credo yourself. …

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3/13/2019

… It's too bad that your photo with the WH interns today will not have as much diversity. You need to work on that so you can combat the image that you only like to hang out with White men. As Eugene Scott pointed out in the NYT last year, it could be that young POC do not want to work with you. If that's the case, then you should hire Christos Marafatsos to help out. As one of the leaders of your "Diversity Coalition" he's in a great position to recruit some young POCs to apply…

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3/12/2019

… I'm sure you'll have fun meeting the Scouts today. Don't you just love their new motto, "Scout Me In?"  I am curious about the girls that you'll be meeting today, especially Isabella Messer and Michalea Oakes. Isabella, age 10, started her own cub scout group and manages a profitable bee enterprise. Michaela found her confidence when climbing a mountain with her Sea Scout troop…

3/11/2019

…Have you spoken with Bibi Netanyahu lately? According to the NYT he's using your friendship as a selling point in his campaign. It seems that you have lots of fans in Israel. Even so, he's behind in the polls. The NYT attributes this to the corruption scandal that plagues him…

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3/10/2019

…How was your golf game with Lexi Thompson yesterday. She's quite the phenom isn't she, winning an LPGA tournament at age 16? I understand that she's not into politics so she just talks to you about golf. Playing with her must be a nice diversion for you….

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3/9/2019

…I wish I could disapperate, like Harry Potter, and land at Mar-a-Lago in the middle of the day to lay my eyes on the 6th Annual Wine, Women & Shoes For Big Dog Ranch Rescue that your daughter-in-law, Lara, is putting on. I'm afraid that the $5000/table price tag is daunting but I would be intrigued to see if dogs get to come to the party. ..

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3/8/2019

…Please send my greetings to the people in Lee County recovering from Sunday's EF-4 tornado. I was surprised to learn that we now have a new tornado hot spot that is being called "Dixie Alley." …

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3/7/2019

So today you're meeting your buddy, Andrej Babiš, PM of the Czech Republic. That should be fun. According to the Guardian you are two peas in a pod. He's a little richer than you are. You probably have a few more scandals than he does. He seems to have wider popular support. You both have conflicts of interests. You'll have so much to discuss!

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3/6/2019

I was intrigued to see that you are meeting with Rep. Adam Kinzinger (ADK) today. I suspect it has to do with his recent deployment to the border in his role as National Guard pilot. He's been quite vocal about what he saw, supporting your assertion that there is an emergency there. I'm still not convinced and encourage you to remain open to the idea of letting go of this "emergency" thing….

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3/5/2019

 Did you have fun with the BiZons yesterday? You looked tickled pink to get the #45 jersey. What do you do with all of those jerseys? Are they hanging up in your closet? How did the kids like the fast food spread? I worry that the French fries might have gotten cold, and you know that the concealed grease on a cold fry is pretty unappetizing. …

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3/4/2019

… I'm sure that it will be fun for you to greet the North Dakota State University Football team at the WH this morning. According to the Grand Forks Herald, Sen John Hoeven told you about their amazing record of winning 7 Division I FCS championships in the last 8 years….

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3/3/2019

Did Ivanka have a good time at the Gridiron Dinner last night? I'm surprised that you didn't go. Everyone else in your posse was there. I hardly recognized Sarah Sanders (SHB) in her bright pink dress….

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3/2/19

… Have you gone shopping for a clothes washer lately? Have you ever set foot in an appliance store? I wouldn't if I didn't have to - There's 5 different brands and each brand has 3 different models. The latest gimmick is steam …

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